The Soul Calibur resort
by Lt. Wyoming
Summary: The soul calibur gang is all set for a week of relaxation but with a crazed plumber, a rodent problem, fire bad food and even worse only reruns on Tv can they survive? As tensions boil love blossoms between characters. Rated R for later FINISHED!
1. Random facts

Soul Calibur Resort chapter one.

AN: This though is a romance has plenty of humor it's rated R basically just to be safe. I do not own SCII!

The entire Soul Calibur cast excluding Yungsung and Cervantes sat around a coffee table. They were bored out of their minds. They had had nothing to do for over two months and it was beginning to drive them crazy. The same thing seemed to happen everyday. Everyone would go to work get back home and spar, then they would eat then, they would watch the sunset. Nightmare was a little edgy and his sword was driving him crazy. You see Nightmare liked Sophitia but he never had the courage to talk to her. Every time she would walk by or he would walk by his sword would yell in his mind. "Talk to her!" But you see it would get louder as she got closer. "Talk to her!"...."TALK TO HER JALOPI FACE!" yelled his sword. Then Nightmare would just sigh maybe a weak smile and walk on by then his sword would yell "I HATE YOU! I HATE BEING IN THIS BODY!"

Suddenly Yungsung barged into the room waving a sheet of paper. "Guys! You'll never believe what I have in here!" yelled Yungsung excitedly. "What is it?" asked Taki. "I was reading the newspaper today and they said that whoever could come to the printing press shop and answer random question would win a trip to a resort!" yelled Yungsung. Suddenly everyone got excited. "But I lost." Said Yungsung. Everyone sighed and looked down at the ground. "However as far as I know nobody else has won who knows random facts?" asked Yungsung. The group looked around until finally Raphael stood up. "I know a few." He replied. "Good! Your our man!" declared Yungsung.

At the printing shop Raphael got through the questions easily even after the manager started throwing obscure questions like: How long is a standard coat hanger when stretched out to a line? Raphael answered 44 inches. The manager finally gave up and gave the entire SCII cast except Cervantes tickets to the resort. "Well get outta' here!" sighed the manager. The group rushed off to the resort. The resort was huge and the entire place was all to them it was like a giant city.

"This place is amazing!" whispered Lizard man. The girls went straight to the swimming pool. All in very exposing swim suits. The men stood and drooled that was until Taki invited Mitsurugi in for a swim. Mitsurugi eagerly jumped into the pool after of course getting on some trunks. Nightmare was quick to follow along with the rest except Necrid and Voldo who seemed horrified of the water.

Actually Necrid was afraid, Voldo just knew nobody would even talk to him, which made sense since Voldo couldn't talk himself. Ivy saw Voldo looking hurt. "Voldo! Necrid! Why don't you guys come for a dip?" Ivy who was wearing a black bikini top and a black bikini thong. Necrid almost swallowed his own throat. Voldo though reluctant expecting a teasing trap eventually joined the rest.

They group splashed on and on into the night until finally it was time for bed. They all went into their rooms to get some sleep. The next day the group planned to have a bowling tournament then go swimming again which al the men were looking forward to.

AN: Okay short chapter I know the next I promise to be longer. Review if I don't get reviews I won't be motivated to write more!


	2. Bowl for turkey

Bowl for Turkey

AN: Hey this is the next chapter I hope I get much more reviews well here it goes my 2nd chapter. I do not own SCII.

The next morning everyone came down for breakfast. The breakfast buffet was amazing. There were muffins, orange juice, cereal, milk, hash browns, egg sandwiches, croissants and much more. "Look at all this food!" exclaimed Yungsung. "Aha, I think I will have that egg sandwich!" stated Mitsurugi as he grabbed an egg sandwich and gobbled it down rather quickly. Taki had a blueberry muffin and some apple juice. Lizard man couldn't keep his claws off the croissants. Necrid basically ate everything along with Astroph and Talim whom everyone was surprised to see ate so much.

Astroph, Necrid, Voldo and Yoshimitsu sat at one table. Taki, Mitsurugi, Yungsung, Seung Mina and Assassin sat at another. Ivy, Raphael, Berserker (who choose a light breakfast surprisingly.) Along with Xiangua, Cassandra, Sophitia and Nightmare. Lizard man sat with Charade. The groups talked about random things for about one hour while eating. "So then I told him why haven't you mowed the lawn?" said Taki laughing as the entire table erupted in laughter at Taki's joke. Suddenly though a horn was heard. "Where did that come from?" asked the Assassin. "I-I don't know?" answered Mitsurugi. Suddenly Taki covered her nose and waved at the air.

"Ugh! Who let one go? It smells like rotten eggs!" shrieked Taki. Mitsurugi just blushed. Suddenly the rest of the table caught wind of the smell. "Ah man! That is rancid!" teased Yungsung. Seung Mina jokingly fell out of her chair and squirmed around in pain. Mitsurugi tried to defend himself. "It's not funny!" said Mitsurugi, but the table was already rolling with laughter.

At another table Yoshimitsu was discussing current events. "Did you hear that there is going to be a tax break for the upper and not middle class?" asked Yoshimitsu. Voldo hissed. "I know how come us hard working people never can get the things we deserve?" asked Astroph. "I was a barber for eighteen years and I never had a raise. In fact they cut my salary because the shop was doing badly!" stated Astroph. "How much was cut?" asked Yoshimitsu. "Fifteen percent." Replied Astroph. This took the whole table back. "It's all good though. Now I kill people for a living!" said Astroph. "Cheers to that!" said Yoshimitsu.

At another table Nightmare was sweating like a pig. "Man, I should've put on more deodorant. Now I smell like onions." Thought Nightmare. "So Nightmare, seen any good plays lately?" asked Sophitia. "I haven't been to a play in years." Replied Nightmare. "Oh, then you must see this new play it just came out! It's about a two runaway lovers who end up falling in love with trees!" offered Sophitia. Nightmare nodded. "If you ask me the best plays were by that Shakespeare guy." Said Ivy. "I don't think he really likes all those plays. I think he has someone who writes the plays for him." Said Raphael. "No way! Shakespeare is a genius!" said Ivy raising her voice a bit. "I don't know how could a guy write three great plays like Romeo and Juliet along with Othello and King Leer? Pretty suspicious to me." Implied Berserker.

"You all are haters of the British art!" accused Ivy. At Lizard man and Charade's table they ate alone. "You know for once in my life I'd like to just be able to be accepted." Sighed Lizard man. Charade nodded in agreement. "At school kid would point and call me Scaly butt crack." Sighed Lizard man. Lizard man took a bite out of his croissant. Charade sipped his orange juice.

Later at bowling alley inside resort...

Everyone was bowling well, everyone except Nightmare who had trouble getting a good grip on the ball. "Curse this bowling ball1" yelled Nightmare as he sliced a blue bowling ball in half. Voldo also had some difficulty playing but was far better than gutter balling it every frame like Nightmare. It came down to the last frame the two leaders were Taki and Cassandra. Cassandra walked up and prepared her ink bowling ball.

"Cassandra walks up the lane. She readies herself. She needs to keep herself at a high score and then she'll win it!" commentated Cassandra to herself. Cassandra bowled and knocked down five pins. Cassandra regained her ball. "Come on go for the split!" whispered Cassandra to herself. But when she rolled the ball she only managed to knock over two more. "Oh! Looks like Cassandra got a seven! Lowest score tonight! Taki just needs to knock down two pins to win!" chuckled Yungsung. "Crap!" whined Cassandra as she sat down.

Taki got up and stretched her fingers making a loud cracking sound. "It's go time!" she yelled. Taki then got ready to roll the ball but just as she was about to Mitsurugi farted. Taki missed the main set of pins and only managed to knock down one. "Mitsurugi! You're throwing off my groove!" Taki tried to pick up a ball but she dropped it. Taki bent down to pick it up, immediately all the men took the chance to stare at Taki's butt.

Taki then about to roll Mitsurugi farted again! This time loud and long with short little putt putts at the end. Taki completely missed and the ball landed in the gutter...in another lane! Taki turned around and glared at Mitsurugi. Cassandra jumped up in victory. "In your face! Loser!" taunted Cassandra as she held up a loser sign. Taki sighed. "Look on the bright side at least you didn't do as badly as Nightmare." Chuckled Ivy pointing at Nightmare's score, which was zero. Everyone laughed at that even Nightmare had to laugh.

Later that night after swimming Mitsurugi lay in bed thinking about Taki. Also about how mad Taki was since he had messed up her game. Suddenly Yungsung came in. "Hey buddy...Whoa!" yelped Yungsung suddenly jumping back. "Who are you thinking about?" asked Yungsung. "Taki." Replied Mitsurugi. "Is that why you brought your portable tent?" asked Yungsung pointing at Mitsurugi's covers, which had a huge increase in elevation in one certain area. Mitsurugi let out a yelp and fell out of bed. Yungsung laughed and exited the room.

AN: Well that's the end of chapter two. Chapter three coming soon! Review! It gives me motivation.


	3. The trip there and feelings!

The trip there and Feelings!

AN: Well in response to a recent review this chapter will have a flashback to the car ride to the resort. Read and Review! I don't own SCII or any deodorant names you hear. That also includes products you hear throughout the chapter.

Kilik sat up in his bed watching horrible reruns of TV shows. For some reason in the summer the worst episodes were shown. He couldn't figure out why either. He just remembered the ride to this place. It was very annoying.

Flashback

"Hey! Mitsurugi! Stop poking me!" cried Taki as Mitsurugi poked her in the side making her flex. Mitsurugi just let out a laugh. Nightmare was driving in the front. "Quiet down you two!" yelled Nightmare. "He started it!" explained Taki. "I don't care who started it, I'll finish it!" barked Nightmare. Then he saw Sophitia curl up almost afraid.

"I'm sorry I yelled. You know I'm just trying to keep things quiet. I really need to concentrate on the road. It's getting darker and such." Explained Nightmare. "Dude, It's noon on a bright and sunny day." Stated Yungsung. "You keep that to yourself!" snapped Nightmare. The entire van got silent. There was along silence, Voldo just sharpened his claws during the silence, which seemed to drive Cassandra crazy. Which it did to everyone else with the screeching and the scratching.

"Stop that please!" begged Cassandra putting her hands over her ears. Voldo stared at Cassandra for a moment sighed and stopped. There was another moment of silence. Then finally Seung Mina spoke. "I have to go pee." She whispered to Nightmare. "No way were stopping we just stopped a half hour ago. Let's get on the road again." Said Nightmare. "No. I have to go...now!" whispered Seung Mina now a little louder. "No! Were going to keep going for at least another fifteen minutes! And there is nothing you can do about it!" yelled Nightmare. Seung Mina gave Nightmare one quick glare. Nightmare froze. "O-Okay we'll stop there's a rest stop less than a mile from here.

At the rest stop Seung Mina and the others took care of business. Surprisingly Astroph had to remind Raphael to wash his hands. Everyone was back in the car ready to go. Well all except Yoshimitsu. You see Yoshimitsu was having constipation in the bathroom. Yungsung waited patiently for him outside the stall. "Come on man! Hurry up!" ordered Yungsung. "I'm trying! But it just won't come out!" explained Yoshimitsu. "Well make it come out!" barked Yungsung. "Don't rush me! It's a big one!" snapped Yoshimitsu. Then there was silence for a few seconds. "It's coming out!" yelled Yoshimitsu in disturbing pleasure. Suddenly a gigantic splash was heard. "Oh, that can't be healthy. It's all green and wrinkly." Described Yoshimitsu. Yungsung couldn't take it he found another stall and puked his guts out.

Later back on the road there was silence again. "Hey I have any idea why don't we play a game?" asked Talim. "What game would that be?" asked Raphael. "We can play charades." Suggested Talim. Charade seemed to give Talim and evil look. Necrid who was sitting next to Talim just kind of grunted. "Okay let's go!" squealed Talim as she jerked her hand back hitting Necrid in the face. Necrid screamed in pain as he held his face. "What's going on back there?" asked Nightmare. Necrid bashed his head against the side of the van causing the van to spin out. "Nightmare! What's going on?" asked a worried Sophitia. "I can't control the van! Hold on!" yelled Nightmare as the van spun off the road and down a ditch into a tree.

"Well it can't possibly get worse than this!" sighed Nightmare. Then a bear began to charge at the van. "I change my mind! Yes it can!" yelped Nightmare as he rolled up the windows to the van. The bear sliced at the windows violently. "I think were safe in here." Sighed Seung Mina in relief. Suddenly the bear ripped through the driver's door and grabbed Nightmare. "Why is it always me!?!" screamed Nightmare in agony as he was thrown against a tree by the bear.

"He needs help!" said Kilik as he readied his staff. "Don't do it! You'll be killed!" begged Talim. "I've made up my mind!" stated Kilik heroically. Kilik charged at the bear. The bear just back slapped Kilik into a rock. Kilik was out cold. "Will anybody help him?" asked Sophitia worried. "Personally I never liked the chap." Huffed Raphael. "But he needs help and he did drive us all this way." Pointed out Sophitia. "Good. I can drive the rest of the way." Chuckled Mitsurugi.

Sophitia then rubbed Raphael's chest. "Besides we need a strong man like you." This drove Raphael wild. It also caused right guard to go left, speed stick to slow down and secret to tell all. Raphael ran out of the van and waved his sword. "Horrendous beast! Fight me!" yelled Raphael. The bear paused for a moment then got his dukes up and left jabbed Raphael. Raphael stumbled back. Raphael swung a right hook at the bear. The bear ducked and came up with a powerful uppercut. Raphael's jaw was now bleeding. "Come on you furry pillow! Fight me!" The bear then kicked Raphael in the balls. Raphael fell to the ground in pain. The bear begin the stomp on Raphael.

Kilik regained consciousness. He then hit the bear on the back on the head. The bear fell down face forward. "I am Kilik! Master of all nature!" proclaimed Kilik standing over the bear. Suddenly a highway police trooper came into the clearing. "What in the world?" asked the Trooper looking around at the mess. Nightmare regained consciousness and walked over to the trooper. "I'm so sorry officer. We had a little accident and then we fell into the woods, then a bear attacked us!" explained Nightmare. "What idiot was driving the car?" asked the trooper. "That would be me sir." Said Nightmare meekly. "I'll need to see your license and some sort of registration." Stated the trooper. "Sure. Taki! Go get the registration papers! There in the glove compartment!" yelled Nightmare to Taki.

Taki looked into the glove compartment and found the registration, she handed it to the trooper. The trooper briefly looked over it. "Okay, now you license." Said the trooper. "Of course." Said Nightmare plainly as he searched through his pockets. "My wallet? Where is it?" panicked Nightmare. He couldn't find his wallet anywhere. "I believe that feller has your wallet." Said the trooper as he pointed to a peacock. The peacock had the wallet in its beak. "Give me my wallet you feathered dodo head!" yelled Nightmare as he picked up his sword and started to attack at the peacock. The peacock easily dodged each swing. Nightmare became aggravated and tried to tackle the peacock. The peacock moved out of the way then slapped Nightmare in the face with it's feathers. Nightmare then tackled the peacock successfully but now the peacock was dragging him off the slide of a cliff! Nightmare yelped in fear. The peacock hovered over the river that the cliff dropped into. Nightmare managed to grab the wallet out of the bird's beak. "Got my wallet back! What now pea brain?" taunted Nightmare. The peacock then dropped Nightmare into the river.

Nightmare struggled to get out of the strong tide that was pulling him down the river. However he was exhausted and so swimming the other way was impossible. Then Nightmare looked for braches to grab onto but there were none. "Well I'll just be a little wet no big deal. Nightmare then looked forward to see he was about to go over a huge waterfall. "Oh my gosh!" screamed Nightmare as was suddenly thrown down into the river by the waterfall. Nightmare swam for his life and made it eventually safely on the riverbank.

The trooper was waiting for Nightmare when he got back his armor was rusted and his face bloodied from hitting a few rocks. The trooper looked calmly at Nightmare. "Do you have your driver's license?" asked the trooper unconcerned with Nightmare's current condition. Nightmare simply nodded and showed him his license. The trooper briefly looked it over. "Okay you're free to go. Have a nice day!" smiled the trooper as he walked back up the hill. Nightmare looked at his van. They still had to get it back up the hill. "All the men come out and help me push!" sighed Nightmare.

Soon enough the men were out helping Nightmare push the enormous van up the hill. In the van Sophitia read reader's digest, Xiangua read MP3 for dummies. Taki read the bible, Seung Mina read Sigmund Freud's work, Talim read A hitchhiker's guide to the universe and Ivy read Tuck Everlasting. Finally then men managed to get the van back onto the hill. Astroph sighed in relief. "Right now what I need is Gatorade!" stated Astroph. Astroph reached for the cooler opened it and found nothing. "Where's all the drinks?" asked Astroph. Cassandra burped. "I didn't have a book to read." Said Cassandra as if that was a reasonable excuse for drinking twenty bottles of Gatorade. Cassandra's figure though hadn't even seemed to change. "How do you keep yourself so thin Cassandra?" asked Ivy. "High metabolism." Chirped Cassandra. "Well all I know is if you want a nice butt you have to level it out eat some sweets but burn off some fat. That was you keep your figure but gain a few curves if you know what I mean." Chuckled Taki. All the girls then chuckled. Yungsung's mouth dropped almost down to his chest. "Stop drooling Yungsung." Teased Mitsurgui.

Nightmare got into the van and toggled his rear view mirror. It looked as if he was going to say something instead he just sighed. He closed the door to the van and they were off again. It had only been about three minutes when Cassandra spoke up. "I have to pee."

End Flashback

Kilik smiled at the thought of the trip. He then went to bed. The next morning everyone was bustling around. Taki was in the Gym along with Mitsurugi who was more just watching her. Lizard man was still in his room watching the Today show. Yungsung was kind of hanging around with some other guys. Kilik was till asleep. Cassandra was at the bowling alley along with Sophitia who was teaching Nightmare how to bowl.

"Okay Nightmare use your non-possessed hand." Instructed Sophitia. "But I'm right-handed!" whined Nightmare. "Yes you won't do that great but it's better than gutter balling it every frame." Said Sophitia. Nightmare couldn't argue with that. Suddenly Talim walked into the room. "Hey Yoshimitsu is calling a golf tournament." Announced Talim. Everyone rushed onto the course to begin play...

AN: Okay next chapter it's Golf time baby!...Sorry If I just scared you. Hope you enjoyed this chapter review so I can find out. Also give suggestions to the plot I love suggestions! Next chapter up real soon!


	4. Golfing and Flooding

Golfing Floods

AN: Okay it's been awhile since I've written anything. Please don't hold this against me; I was on Winter break with my family. I hope you all enjoy this chapter please review. I don't own SCII. Or Dora the explorer. I do not own Polo or any other companies aid throughout this chapter. P.S. If you don't know how to play golf it's okay this chapter is all golf.

The whole gang started to play golf. Nightmare was actually doing fairly on the holes. Sure by hole ten he still hadn't gotten under a double bogey but it was better than bowling. The top three leaders of this sporting event were Yungsung who wore full golfing attire; the fuzzy cap, the plaid high-water pants, the polo t-shirt, the white gloves and even brown golf shoes. Yungsung never got a bogey the entire game. In fact about half of the holes played were eagles. Yungsung on the eleventh hole managed to get a hole in one on a par three. "Hole in one! Beat that Talim!" challenged Yungsung as he started walking towards the twelfth hole.

Talim wore a blue t-shirt jeans golf gloves and a visor cap. "Just don't crying to your mom after I'm done with you!" teased Talim. Talim was only behind Yungsung by one stroke. Talim tried to get the ball in the hole on one stroke but it was just a little short. Talim tapped the ball in now she was two strokes behind the seemingly invincible Yungsung. Necrid was in third place. His great power and precision got him only two strokes behind Talim. Necrid wore his usual attire except for his shoes, which were golf shoes with big red fuzz balls on the ends.

As the game progressed on Talim managed only to be one stroke behind Yungsung. It was the last hole on a par four Yungsung was preparing for an easy putt into the hole. Talim didn't have such an easy putt and if Yungsung made it in she would surely lose. Meanwhile Taki was in fourth place at the beginning of the last hole. Mitsurugi who was right behind her in fifth place looked at her lovingly. Taki was wearing a yellow tank top and short shorts. "You look stunning today love." Sighed Mitsurugi leaning onto his erect club. "Don't call me love creep." Breathed Taki. Mitsurugi nearly froze to death over her coldness. "Baby, I was just calling you based on what I feel towards you." Smirked Mitsurugi still gazing at Taki's yellow tank top. "Fine, be quiet puke." Said Taki as she lined herself for the drive. Mitsurugi shook his head. "Don't hide your feelings for me sweet cheeks." Chuckled Mitsurugi as he pinched Taki's butt. This was just as Taki was swinging her club shocked by Mitsurugi's gesture she let go of the golf club and it flew into the air. The golf club then hit Yungsung in the right arm just as he was putting. Yungsung yelped in pain and missed the hole by a few inches.

Talim then putted the ball perfectly into the hole she had managed to tie with Yungsung. Yungsung infuriated with Taki ran up to meet her. "Why would you do that Taki? For some sick pleasure?" asked and angry Yungsung. Taki was rubbing her butt, not because it hurt but because she felt violated. "No this loser pinched my fanny and I let go of the club on accident." Explained Taki glaring at Mitsurugi. Mitsurugi then backed up. "So it's your fault sushi loving samurai!" yelled Yungsung. "Wait, notice I still have my armor on. Hit me, it'll hurt you more than it'll hurt you." Beamed Mitsurugi. Yungsung picked up a golf club and nine iron to be exact and smacked Mitsurugi in the face with it. Mitsurugi screamed in pain the rolled down the hill into a lake.

"Thanks I would have done that myself but you know, it means so much more coming from a man." Thanked Taki. "Perhaps you shouldn't wear such revealing clothing." Suggested Yungsung. "I'm wearing this outfit for someone else." Winked Taki. Yungsung pointed at himself. "No, not you! I'm not going tot tell you right now, maybe later." Explained Taki as she walked away slowly to pick up her club, Yungsung watched her the whole way.

Later in Raphael's room nature called and Raphael had to answer. Raphael pulled sown his pants and prepared to sit on the toilet and read Southern cooking weekly but then noticed something wasn't quite right with the bathroom floor. The bathroom was flooding and pipe had sprung a leak! Raphael screamed like a girl for a brief moment because he couldn't swim then he realized that it only about three inches deep and couldn't drown him. The water was beginning to leak all over his carpet as well. Raphael ran to the customer service phone (Yes I know there were no phones back then so sue me.) "Hi this is Raphael from room 212 I need a plumber." Pleaded Raphael into the phone.

"There will be someone up in a brief moment." Answered the phone. Raphael hung up the phone suddenly more of the pipes burst open causing a bigger flood of water. "Crap! The water was now becoming a huge problem. It was coming out too fast Raphael decided to lock the door to the bathroom shut. Then the plumber and Nightmare walked in. "Hey Raphael what's up?" asked Nightmare looking at the water. "Oh a couple of pipes broke." Explained Raphael trying to sound calm. "Well were are the pipes?" asked the fat plumber. "In the bathroom." Said Raphael as he pointed to the door, which was now beginning to crack because of the water pressure. "Sweet Jesus you idiot! Now the water is building up in there at unknown rates! The pressure will explode the door!" Snapped the plumber.

"Oh honestly it can't be that bad…can it?" asked Nightmare. Suddenly the door burst open and water came into the room at high rates. "Turn it off!" yelled a panicked Raphael. The water was banging against them knocking them down. "I'll have to get downstairs somehow but I can't get up!" explained the plumber. "Open the door!" yelled Nightmare. "I can't reach the door!" squealed Raphael. "Stop being such a girl if we don't soon—The plumber was cut off because the room exploded with water and everyone in the room came flying out into the main hall. The water caused a gigantic tidal wave. The plumber threw his wrench at a red pipe the wrench connected with the pipe and stopped the water flow. However not having the tidal wave hit Astroph at full blast.

Five hours later after all the water had been vacuumed up the plumber walked over to Raphael. "I've had some pretty bad situations in my life, but that was the worst! Were lucky to be alive!" with that the plumber walked away. "My room is completely destroyed can I room with any of you guys?" asked Raphael. Nightmare let Raphael room with him. "This time however you use the public restroom." Joked Nightmare.

Kilik was watching reruns of That 1370's show on TV and was cracking up at the antics of the characters. Suddenly there was a knock on the door and Taki walked in wearing a brown coat which was obviously too big for her and was completely buttoned up. "Hey Kilik." Said Taki nervously. "Oh hey Taki what can I do for you?" asked Kilik as he turned off the TV. "You can take me!" said Taki huskily. "What?" asked a completely shocked Kilik as he rolled off the bed. "I've wanted you for the longest time Kilik! I want you tonight!" moaned Taki. Though Kilik was very turned on by this he couldn't betray his friend Mitsurugi.

"Well what about Mitsurugi? What's wrong with him?" said a nervous Kilik. "What's wrong with him? He's a sleaze!" exclaimed Taki. Kilik thought about it for a moment and then agreed. Taki then took off her coat and dropped it to the ground to reveal red lingerie. Kilik's jaw dropped.

"Wait Taki let's not rush things. Let's see what's on TV." Suggested a very shaky Kilik as he turned on the TV. "Look! Dora the Explorer is on!" On the TV Dora was on a little train cart in a tunnel. Boots her monkey friend was with her. Suddenly a train whistle was heard. "Do you hear the train?" asked Dora. Dora then paused. "Tell the train to stop! Yell stop!" Kilik did not respond to Dora's plea. "I can't hear you!" smiled Dora as the other train steadily approached. Neither Kilik nor Taki replied. "No really I can't hear you tell it to stop!…Oh my God!" yelled Dora as the train horn was heard and then ran over Dora and Boots killing them. Dora's dismembered arm landed on the windshield a bloody mess.

Kilik turned off the TV. "That was random." Taki then jumped onto Kilik. "Take me tonight!" squealed Taki kissing Kilik's neck. "No! I have a bad case of diarrhea! Oh! I feel it coming on again!" lied Kilik. Taki got off of Kilik. "Okay then hun, to be continued." Taki then walked out of the room. "Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha, anybody! Give me strength!"

AN: Okay next chapter will be coming soon keep giving those reviews!


	5. Animal House

Animal House

AN: Well here comes the next chapter! I hope you all enjoy it. Review please! I do not own SCII.

Sophitia walked up to Nightmare in the hallway. "Hey Nightmare! How's it going?" asked Sophitia cheerfully. Nightmare began to get very nervous. "Oh hi Sophitia!" said Nightmare trying to sound casual. "Hey, I rented this movie Animal House a while ago. We need to return it." Stated Sophitia.

"How did you rent a movie?" asked Nightmare. "Stick with the plot twist." Whispered Sophitia. "Oh, I get you!" said Nightmare as he pointed at Sophitia shaping his fingers as pistols. Nightmare then put his hands in pockets. "So how far away is this video store?" asked Nightmare. "Just about fifteen miles." Answered Sophitia. "Good we can take my van!" stated Nightmare. This was too perfect a chance to be in the van all alone with Sophitia. "Hey! I'm coming too!" proclaimed Xianghua. Nightmare sighed in defeat he knew he couldn't say no. "Fine! Come on let's go I don't want to miss the dancing contest tonight." Smiled Nightmare as he headed for his van.

In the van Xianghua and Sophitia babbled on about useless girl things. Nightmare slanted his eyes looking on the road. "Sure is foggy." Stated Nightmare. Suddenly a semi-truck hit Nightmare's van from the back. Everyone jerked forward but were restrained thanks to their seatbelts. (What's holding you back?) "What the heck is going on?" panicked Xianghua.

Sophitia looked behind her to see Cervantes driving a semi-truck laughing maliciously. "It's Cervantes! He's trying to kill us!" screamed Sophitia. "Okay it's time I stick this into high gear! Which really can't happen because I don't own a stick shift. I wanted a stick shift but my mom said that a stick shift would cost to much in the long run. She said that I would always burn out the clutch. One time my dad burned out the clutch that was stupid. It smelled so bad and my dad said words I don't even want to repeat. My mom got so mad at him, and made him sleep on the couch he was grumpy for two months!" said Nightmare very quickly.

"Nightmare this isn't the time!" barked Xianghua. Nightmare increased his speed by 20 M.P.H. but Cervantes was still catching up with them. "Thanks for not inviting me on vacation! Now I shall destroy you all!" laughed Cervantes. "You tried to take over the world! You're a maniac!" explained Sophitia. "Maybe so. But I still deserve a vacation once in a while!" said Cervantes. Everyone in the van nodded in agreement. "Excellent point." Observed Nightmare. "So what's your choice death, return rental or let me join on this wonderful vacation." Offered Cervantes.

Later Nightmare, Sophitia and Xianghua returned the movie to the front counter. "Well he did give us a choice." Said Sophitia. The clerk looked oddly at Nightmare's possessed arm. "Dude what is that?" asked the clerk shocked. "Well you see it's…a rare disease! Got it as a teen. Don't do drugs stay in school!" instructed Nightmare as the group exited the video store to get to the dance.

AN: Short chapter I know the next one will come up soon.


	6. Disco Dancing

Disco dancing

AN: Well here comes the next chapter I hope you guys enjoy it. I feel as though I have said this every chapter and I think I have. Well I don't own SCII so read and review! I don't own any songs listed.

In the hotel everyone had gone to the disco dance floor. The music was from the 60's through early 80's and everyone was getting down. So far Yungsung seemed to the best with his John Trovolta impersonation. The music staying alive played in the background.

Xianghua was good at dancing as well. Everyone chanted, "Go Xianghua! It's your birthday were going to party like it's your birthday!" Nightmare just moved his shoulders a bit, he wasn't much of a dancer. Voldo started to get down with his stylish break dancing. Voldo got up and did the c-walk and impressed everyone. Sophitia approached Nightmare and tapped his shoulder. "Hey why don't you get out there and dance?" asked Sophitia. "No, I can't. I'm a horrible dancer. Everyone will laugh at me." Sighed Nightmare taking a sip out of the punch from the concession table.

"Come on nothing could be that bad! Look Taki and Ivy are twirking with each other." Pointed out Sophitia as she pointed to Taki and Ivy. Taki's butt was grinding up on Ivy's crotch area in a very intense twirk motion. "See get out there and dance!" ordered Sophitia. There was no reply from Nightmare. "Nightmare?" Sophitia looked at a drooling bloodied nose Nightmare who was staring at the twirking couple with wide eyes. "Yeah, I think I will go out there and dance." Said Nightmare almost mechanically as he jumped out onto the dance floor and started waving his hands in the air.

Nightmare then tried to do the robot but it was poor and his hands were uneven. Nightmare tried to do the c-walk but all it really turned out to be was him walking backwards slowly. "Guys watch this pop and lock!" yelled Nightmare and he shook one hand then four seconds later shook the other in the air. Nightmare then grabbed the back of his head and started humping the air. "Usher can't touch this! Want some of this Sophitia?" yelled Nightmare still humping the air. The disco music stopped and everyone looked at Nightmare still humping the air. Nightmare saw that everyone was watching feeling embarrassed he slid over to the concession table. Sophitia was no longer there.

Nightmare hung his head in shame. Yungsung walked up to Nightmare and slapped him lightly in the face. "Don't ever dance like that again! You bring disgrace to the art of dancing!" said Yungsung. Nightmare sighed heavily.

Nightmare walked in his room where Raphael lay on the bed reading a book. "Hey Raphael, could you teach me some dance moves?" asked Nightmare. Raphael closed the book and sat up straight in the bed. "What kind black or white dance moves?" asked Raphael. "White ones I'm not black duh!" said Nightmare chuckling as he lifted up his arms and then brought back down to his side quickly. "So your trying to slow dance or party dance?" asked Raphael now standing up straight off the bed. "Slow dance, I want to impress Sophitia." Replied Nightmare.

Nightmare's sword began to talk to him again. "NO! DO THE WORLD AFAVOR AND NEVER DANCE AGAIN!" crackled the sword. "Shut up1" snapped Nightmare. "Well then Nightmare, let us dance!" said Raphael bowing. "Hey man! I don't party like that!" said Nightmare backing up.

"I'm not gay, I'm about as gay as you are black!" said Raphael getting out of his bowing position. "What you talkin' 'bout Willis?" said Nightmare angrily. "First lesson in dancing sophisticated, you must ask the girl properly. Pretend I'm Sophitia." Nightmare choked on his own spit. "Excuse me?" said a gasping Nightmare. "I'm serious you have to practice with someone." Explained Raphael. Nightmare looked around the room to make sure nobody was watching. "Hey,…Sophitia. Can I have this dance?" asked Nightmare with his hands behind back.

"That was horrible! A prostitute wouldn't say yes to that!" insulted Raphael. "You must be finesse about it. Proper. Call her miss Sophitia and then bow ask her if you'd like to dance. If she says yes hold out your hand to greet hers." Instructed Raphael. "OH YES! HOT WOMEN HANDS TURN ME ON IMMENSLY!" bellowed Nightmare's sword. Now we need two proper people to show you how to dance properly. "Good, cause there is not a snowball's chance in hell I'd dance with you." Said Nightmare sitting down on a lounge chair.

"Now who would be perfect for the job whose proper and who can dance?" asked Raphael rubbing his chin. "Aha! By George I've got it!" said Raphael punching his right fist into his left palm.

Later Ivy and Voldo came into the room. "So I have to dance with Voldo?" asked Ivy pointing at Voldo. "Yes, now remember you two you must dance perfectly so that Nightmare can see the right way. "Very well." Said Ivy as she stood in her usual purple attire as Voldo approached her. Voldo bowed elegantly and talked in hisses and screeches. Voldo then held out his clawed hand lightly for Ivy to grab. "Well Ivy what are you waiting for? Accept his hand!" shouted Raphael. Ivy cautiously grabbed Voldo's hand and they began to dance. Nightmare watched their elegant dance from the lounge chair.

"You two make a cute couple." Joked Nightmare. "OH YES! SHE HAS HOT HANDS TOO!" moaned Nightmare's sword. "Now Nightmare when the song ends and just imagine it has you two, you should lean in for a romantic kiss!" instructed Raphael. Nightmare leaned in to get a better look at the dancing Ivy and Voldo. "Well I want to see how to kiss romantically. Can you two show me?" asked Nightmare smirking. Ivy gulped.

"Come on you two. Kiss up Nightmare needs visual instruction." Ordered Raphael. Ivy and Voldo pecked each other's lips real quick. "Oh, that's not romantic! I want to see a real kiss!" pleaded Nightmare. Ivy sighed lightly then leaned in and both Ivy and Voldo began to kiss passionately.

"That's brilliant! You two can stop." Said Raphael. But Ivy and Voldo didn't stop they both were actually enjoying the kiss! They began to make love violently. Then Ivy and Voldo fell onto the bed and Ivy began to take off her clothes. Raphael and Nightmare seeing what was happening left the room quickly. Nightmare shut the door and waited out in the hallway. "Well, that was strange to look at." Admitted Nightmare. "I'd better call room service." Said Raphael. "Why?" asked Nightmare. "We'll need new sheets." Answered Raphael.

AN:


	7. Burn Baby Burn!

Burn baby burn!

AN: Alright I've got a review saying I forgot two people in the story well just keep reading man! Kilik and Maxi are in plenty more chapters after chapter two! So, I've got this chapter coming up now, I'll try to give Maxi a big part in this chapter. Thank you for all the great reviews so far! Don't be shy write some more. I don't own Soul Calibur II.

Mitsurugi sat in the kitchen. He of course was thinking about Taki again. "Why do I act so stupid around her?" growled Mitsurugi as he pulled on this own hair. Then Taki walked into the kitchen. "Oh it's you. Why don't you go somewhere and die?" hissed Taki as she looked in the fridge for anything to eat. "Listen Taki I'm real sorry. Give me one more chance, I'll take you on a date you'll never forget!" exclaimed Mitsurugi as he waved his hands symbolically. "You mean a date I'll want to forget right?" she asked blinking a few times. "No, I'm serious let me take you out and show you how it's really done." Offered Mitsurugi know getting on his knees. "Okay just don't grovel!" said Taki as she exited the kitchen. Mitsurugi yelled out to her. "Tomorrow eight o' clock!"

Meanwhile Nightmare was trying to get Sophitia to notice him. Nightmare walked up to her obviously sweaty and nervous. "Ahem, hello Sophitia. I was wondering are you doing anything tonight?" asked Nightmare coughing politely. "No, not really. Why?" asked Sophitia. Nightmare froze was he really about to ask her out? "Sophitia would you go out with me?" asked Nightmare as a bead of sweat rolled down his left cheek. "Sure Nightmare that would be nice." Almost whispered Sophitia blushing. "Great I'll see you tonight in the grand ballroom. I have a special treat for you." Smiled Nightmare as he almost skipped away.

Maxi walked into the kitchen with Astroph. "Remind me why are we here?" asked Astroph looking at the bag of flour. "We are going to cook an amazing dinner for everyone. I mean we only have two more days here we might as well make something cool." Explained Maxi as he got out some cooking equipment. "Since when have we become pansies?" asked Astroph. "Real men can cook." Stated Maxi as he pulled out two aprons.

"Which apron do you want Astroph? Flowers or Unicorns?"

"Unicorns."

"Aye, I thought so."

Ivy and Voldo finally came out of the hotel room. Ivy's hair was messed up and some of Voldo's cloth was loose. "That was the most amazing night and morning I have ever had!" moaned Ivy as she looked around the hall. Voldo nodded his head in agreement. "I'm going back to my room to wash up and get some rest." Stated Ivy as she walked down the hall. Voldo looked behind to see Ivy's action. Their night was great; the incessant sex hadn't tired out Voldo at all however. Voldo didn't get tired, that just wasn't his thing. So Voldo decided he'd watch reruns of his favorite TV show.

As it got later in the day Sophitia got ready for her date. Cassandra however was not giving her the most encouraging words. "Sophitia don't wear that! It's tacky, trust me you need the best outfit." Said Cassandra putting a hand on her hip. "Why do you say that?" asked Sophitia. "Sister, you need an outfit that is going to show off your curves and send Nightmare's car shooting out of his garage, if you know what I mean." Giggled Cassandra.

"Cassandra, how many times do I have to tell you? It's just a date between tow friends, nothing more." Said Sophitia as she decided which dress to wear. "Oh come on Sophie! I know you've liked Nightmare since you were little." Pointed out Cassandra. "Yes, well I…shut up!" almost barked Sophitia as she decided to wear a sleek blue dress.

Mitsurugi was getting ready for his last chance to impress Taki wearing a white tuxedo. Kilik was commenting on his choice of clothing. "Well, that's surely a fine pick." Exclaimed Kilik. "Thank you, if I do say so myself. I believe tonight is the night. I can feel it!" said Mitsurugi as he fixed his hair. "Tonight, Taki will fall into my arms and beg me to be the one to take her virginity!" said Mitsurugi as he jumped up and down. Kilik suddenly stood up. "Whoa! Whoa! Buddy calm down, you shouldn't even think about having sex with a woman until your married and that's the truth! Besides I doubt Taki is a virgin." Explained Kilik as he looked at the ground. "Well no matter, I will steal her heart tonight. I've planned it out with Nightmare. We will dance all night. Maxi and Astroph are also making a gigantic meal." Proclaimed Mitsurugi as he fixed his bow tie. "I can't wait to chow down on those delicious pies Maxi is making. Chillin' on the chow line…good times!" sang Kilik as he swung his head.

Later Sophitia and Taki came down to meet Nightmare and Mitsurugi. Taki wore a red dress that left little to the imagination and Nightmare wore a plain black tuxedo. Nightmare and Mitsurugi went through all the steps perfectly as the asked the ladies to dance. Not only that they danced perfectly. Raphael was on the piano playing smooth jazz as the couples danced. "Mitsurugi I'm shocked! You really can dance." Complimented Taki. "Thank you my dear, and might I add you look beautiful today. Not like you don't everyday." Said Mitsurugi in a smooth voice. Taki blushed furiously. "Nightmare I didn't know you were this charming." Giggled Sophitia. Nightmare had pulled out all the stops he had even got a haircut from Voldo. "Thank you, I learned from the best." Said Nightmare as he winked at Raphael. Though Raphael probably didn't see it, because he had just put on his Ray Charles glasses. This night is perfect! Nothing can go wrong! As Nightmare thought these things something did go wrong.

Maxi was in the kitchen cooking with Astroph. "Hey I gotta' go to the bathroom. Watch the stove." Said Maxi as he left the kitchen. Astroph couldn't hear Maxi however he was too busy listening to his walkman. Suddenly a burst of flames shot out of the stove and a few sparks got on the carpet. This quickly led to a bigger problem and soon half of the carpet was in flames. Maxi ran into the kitchen seeing the fire. "What in the world? Astroph! You were supposed to be watching the stove!" yelled Maxi in a panic. Astroph turned around to see the flames. "Oh snap, crackle pop!" yelped Astroph as he look frantically for an extinguisher.

The fire was spreading quickly and at this point the fire alarm went off. The sprinkler system turned on and the couples dancing were drenched in water. Everyone came out of their rooms yelling at the sudden burst of water that had got on them. Well, all except for Ivy and Voldo who liked it wet. "What's going on?" barked Talim. "Yeah all my porn magazines are wet!" yelled Yungsung. Everyone looked at Yungsung. Charade just shook his head.

"It's just a little kitchen fire." Explained Astroph. "You call that little? It's burned about 75 of the carpet!" snapped Yoshimitsu. There was a knock heard at the door. Nightmare decided to answer it, his date was ruined anyway. "May I help you?" asked a gloomy Nightmare. A man in a black suit replied. "Yes, have you heard the good news?" asked the man as he held up a pamphlet. On the front of the pamphlet was a picture of Jesus praying. "Look, were in the middle of a fire. Now is not the best time." Groaned Nightmare. "Actually now is the perfect time! You see repent now and you won't have to burn in the fiery pits of hell!" roared the man. Nightmare slowly closed the door on the man. "Who was that?" asked Sophitia trying to dry off her wet dress.

The man knocked again and Nightmare angrily opened the door. "Well if you don't want Jesus how about Buddha?" asked the man giving Nightmare a pamphlet of Buddha on the front. Nightmare handed the pamphlet back to the man. "Leave me alone!" barked Nightmare as he slammed the door. He regained his composure and then walked up to Sophitia. "Sophitia, I'm sorry our night was ruined. I had really hoped I could have impressed you. To be honest I wanted to make you like me." Sighed Nightmare as he looked away from her.

Sophitia smiled then kissed Nightmare on the cheek. "I already like you." Whispered Sophitia. Nightmare grinned. He had just gotten a kiss from Sophitia the woman of his dreams. "One more dance?" asked Sophitia pointing to the dance floor. Raphael was still playing the piano cocking back his head imitating Ray Charles. "I'd be honored." Replied Nightmare.

Taki joined Mitsurugi on the dance floor as well. "Mitsurugi I was wrong about you. You're really sweet. So why did you act that way towards me earlier?" asked Taki. "I don't know. I'm really nervous when I get around you. I do goofy stuff." Replied Mitsurugi. "Well don't be goofy too much." Smiled Taki as she kissed Mitsurugi passionately.

"This is the greatest moment of my life!" cried Raphael. Everyone else watched the couples dance from the upper level.


	8. Checking out

Checking out

AN: Well it's been fun but I've come to the last chapter of this great tale. Thank you to all who review. I do not own Soul Calibur II or any other products or characters like Scooby-Doo in this fic.

The next morning everyone woke up rather quickly. They had no choice today at noon they had to leave. They yawned and packed their bags as they prepared to leave. "I'm going to miss being here. Things were so boring back home, and so alive here." Stated Yungsung to Talim. "Yeah, I really liked this place. Especially all the golf." Sighed Talim. "Hey Talim, I expect to start to match we had earlier up again. Fresh holes and scores." Challenged Yungsung. "Oh you may start it, but I'll finish it." Teased Talim.

"Oh please! Don't stop! Keep going!" moaned Ivy. Everyone passing by the room could hear them and it was quite disgusting to be honest. Ivy constantly moaned and Voldo hissed. "Hey, you guys better get packed! Were leaving!" announced Yoshimitsu. "Be…right…there." Panted Ivy. Yoshimitsu just shook his head and rolled his luggage down to the front.

"So Taki does this mean were dating?" asked a nervous Mitsurugi. "Well, I'll tell you what, you just be yourself and I think everything should work out." Smiled Taki. Mitsurugi swung at the air victorious. "Yes! From now on you'll only see the 100 genuine Mitsurugi!" proclaimed Mitsurugi. Kilik then ran up to the two. "Hey Mitsurugi, you forgot your porn magazines under your bed, not to mention all this lotion." Said Kilik as he handed Mitsurugi a stack of porn magazines and a bottle of lotion. "What? Those aren't mine." Stuttered Mitsurugi. Taki rolled her eyes and laughed.

Maxi sat looking at the burned rug. "I was so close to making the perfect feast, that everyone would enjoy." Sobbed Maxi. Astroph patted Maxi on the back. "Hey, why don't you make some when we get home, I'll know we'll be hungry." Suggested Astroph. "Okay, but I'm getting a new partner." Stated Maxi. "Who would you get to supplant me?" asked Astroph. "Hey Lizardman! You know how to cook?" asked Maxi as he approached the lizard.

Raphael was still playing on the piano. He had been playing all night long. Cassandra approached him. "Raphael it's over. You don't have to keep playing the music." Said Cassandra with a cocked eyebrow and hand on hip. "What? It's over? For how long?' asked a shocked Raphael. "For about six hours." Replied Cassandra. Raphael took off his dark Ray Charles style glasses. "I couldn't see anything through these glasses, must've not seen the love birds leave." Explained Raphael. "Well go get your stuff packed were leaving!" ordered Cassandra. Raphael obeyed.

Nightmare and Sophitia went up to the front desk to check out. Sophitia was hugging Nightmare's side as nightmare's sword spoke to him. "YEAH I CAN FEEL HER TITS PRESSING AGAINST ME! YEAH! LOOK AT HER BUTT! YOU CAN SEE THAT THING FROM THE FRONT! GOTTA' TAP THAT!" bellowed the sword. Nightmare tried his best to block out the comments from the sword.

"Well your all checked out sir. Have a safe trip home." "Thank you." Replied Nightmare. "So Nightmare what do want to do for our second date?" asked Sophitia. "Whatever you want." Answered Nightmare stylishly. Sophitia giggled as the two kissed romantically. "This place is wonderful we have to come back sometime." Stated Sophitia. Xianghua suddenly rushed into their conversation. "Yeah! We could much cooler stuff! Like mud wrestling and ping-pong tournaments!" squealed Xianghua. Nightmare and Sophitia shook their heads as Xianghua babbled on. "Next time we come without them." Whispered Nightmare.

Everyone gathered at the front door to leave in Nightmare's van and smiled. "All good things must come to an end at some time." Said Seung Mina. "I disagree. I think good times have just begun." Said Nightmare as they all left the resort and speed away. It was going to be a long trip, but a fun one nonetheless.

Just as their van left the resort grounds another van pulled in and out hopped the Scooby-Doo gang. (Mystery Inc.) "Like Zoinks! This place looks pretty creepy." Shivered Shaggy. "Oh come on Shaggy, we've seen ghost and goblins nothing at this point can scare us." Assured Fred. The gang walked up to their room. "This is our room." Stated Velma as she pointed to a door. Daphne opened the door and screamed. The gang rushed to see what it was and then screamed themselves. Daphne fainted and Shaggy just stared. "Hey! Get out of our room! Can't you see were busy?" barked Ivy who has covering her exposed breasts with her hands. Voldo just grinned.

THE END

AN: Finally finished! Whew, hoped you liked this story review! Review! Review! Review! Review! Review! I case you didn't hear me review! I hope you enjoyed reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it.


End file.
